Tuesday, February 15
The prosecution won't even need to show up.
370, Mostly Celebrities, on Jackson Witness List

The defense's witness list contains well-known people like Kobe Bryant, Quincy Jones, Larry King, Diana Ross, Elizabeth Taylor and Stevie Wonder. Also on the list are David Blaine, the magician; Deepak Chopra, the motivational speaker and writer; Steve Harvey, the comedian and actor; Nick Carter of the Backstreet Boys singing group; Maury Povich, the talk show host; and Steve Wynn, the Las Vegas casino owner.

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/02/15/national/15jackson.html?

Unlike O.J. and Scotty Peterson, I am not ready to assume that Michael Jackson is guilty. Anyone else facing the same charges, yes, I'd probably vote to convict. But Jackson might not be a child molestor. He might merely be stark-raving insane. A dubious, but worthy distinction. In any case, he deserves to be innocent until proven guilty, which will be any day now as Jackson has apparently assembled a defense team as stark-raving mad as himself. After all, who better to appeal to the jury than the following:

Kobe Bryant, who is at worst a rapist, at best an adulterer who chose to cheat with a complete nutcase.
David Blaine, who chose to spend 44 days starving himself in a see-through box over the River Thames.
Diana Ross, whose altercations with the police include groping an airport security guard and drunk driving.
Nick Carter, who, when hauled in for resisting arrest, started crying and said "You just want to arrest a Backstreet Boy."
Larry King, who, in addition to being Larry King, was arrested in 1971 and charged with grand larceny.
And Stevie Wonder, who is blind.

Yup, that's a crack team the defense has rounded up. The only people who are missing as character witnesses are Charles Manson, Teddy Kennedy, and Ron Jeremy.
 
posted by Jessica at 8:43 AM | Permalink |